From Twitter 07-30-2009

• 15:46:15: oh, this has to be a joke. https://www.shakeweight.org/
  

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From Twitter 07-29-2009

• 10:01:58: What if Obama serves Colt .45 at the White House? Too easy? What if he serves PBR? Or a White Ale? Or a Black Ale (New Belgium 1554)? #fb
  
• 11:36:25: RT @bmcd67: I wish the Barrel Monster was still around to wave at Obama when he drives thru Raleigh!
  
• 11:39:41: @prettyannoyed I doubt it. The Barrel Monster is surely against the death penalty, in favor of recycling. Wouldn't mind heatlh care either.
  
• 12:20:35: I agree with this but getting into the DBAP was a disaster RT @durhammag: A night of (mostly) great music at DBAP. http://tinyurl.com/mzv6au
  
• 15:59:42: what are emails for. when no one reads them anymore. http://bit.ly/Bsruw
  
• 16:18:27: Most whites don't get the white privilege thing RT @hannityhater: http://bit.ly/40mPaS Dear Glenn Beck.. This is what racism looks like.
  
• 16:22:15: @joanwalsh I agree with other comments. Discussion is free publicity. There needs to be consequences for the drivel most wouldn't tolerate.
  
• 16:38:37: @rbrandon How can people play those games and buy those ringtones without us!
  
• 16:48:24: .@rbrandon What I used to work on at Motricity is gone (er, password protected) games.sprintpcs.com They're dead anyway. http://bit.ly/zkJ9d
  
• 22:35:07: .@mammalpants @ginnyskal I use "selective twitter" on facebook. Works well. Add "#fb" tag to the end of your post and it becomes your status
  

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From Twitter 07-28-2009

• 10:05:14: my sweat glands do not think this is funny RT @nsj: Good morning, #Raleigh! #Houston called. They want their humidity back.
  
• 17:12:08: Dear Bob Dylan, a presale means I should get in early and not stand in line for 40 minutes, no? This might become an epic fail.
  
• 17:16:52: Presale and early admission means getting in before the opener starts.
  
• 18:11:27: Who thinks Chris Mortensen will retire now that Favre has retired and he has nothing to do? Rachel Nichols? Ed Warner? #fb
  
• 18:14:37: Willie Nelson, huge Texas flag, guy with Run DMC shirt in right http://yfrog.com/7gv0jj
  
• 20:15:12: Mellencamp has been up for about half an hour. Someone clearly stoned just tried to have a conversation with me about the adirondacks. #fb
  

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From Twitter 07-26-2009

• 22:24:56: I'm glad I've never heard Bat Out Of Hell by Meatloaf. Blech. #fb
  

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From Twitter 07-24-2009

• 07:54:58: ...and we're back from vacation...with about 6 months of work and 2 months to do it in
  
• 08:02:56: @jjx packet loss friday?
  
• 10:24:17: RT @SoTaFMusic "Racing Lights" song premiere - http://ow.ly/hIOJ - Poppier than first album, and that's not a problem. Anxious for new album
  
• 15:07:39: dear programmers. Make sure you compile your project before you check in code. Thanks. #thxboss #onehourtogo
  

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From Twitter 07-18-2009

• 07:58:09: Boss goes to France, family wants chocolate. He buys Lindt. FAIL. I can buy that in US in lots of places. Why not Toblerone too? #fb
  
• 12:10:32: I'm such a Radiohead dork, I was registering for an Internet forum and the security question was "2+2=" I put 5 without thinking. #fb
  
• 13:02:34: I just tried chicken & thyme flavored potato chips. Someone tried to make something else taste like chicken. It tasted like..well...yeah #fb
  
• 15:06:42: BUY MY SHIRT http://www.cafepress.com/dumbyellowshirt #fb
  

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From Twitter 07-13-2009

• 11:27:02: @lnihlen getting what they're giving cause you're workin' for a livin'?
  
• 14:15:22: Ron Howard makin'it rain FTW RT @adamandeve: I've got that Jamie Foxx song stuck in my head. "Blame it on the al-al-alcohol..." #musicmonday
  
• 14:41:08: Awesome! RT @BreakingNews: Bernie Madoff is being transported to the Butner Federal Correctional Complex in North Carolina, CNBC says.
  

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From Twitter 07-12-2009

• 14:13:23: My boss is trying to learn RoboHelp in like 15 minutes. urgh...
  

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From Twitter 07-10-2009

• 09:36:52: @KimEtzel84 install PrimoPDF, a printer driver that prints PDF files.
  
• 09:38:37: @jjx @kimetzel84 that would assume windows comes with a pdf printer driver or Ghostscript or something. FAIL
  
• 09:54:30: @jjx @kimetzel84 FAIL on Windows parts, not yours for assuming either way. My bad if it was so interpreted.
  
• 10:21:23: @KimEtzel84 Can you install a printer driver? If so, install a HP printer driver with PS output and use an online tool like ps2pdf.com
  
• 19:43:32: I'm trying to figure out what I did to deserve a boss with ADD. #fb
  
• 21:54:30: Hey boss, thanks for giving me less than 24 hours notice that you want me to bring coat/tie on business trip instead of khakis. #fb
  

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From Twitter 07-09-2009

• 08:20:54: Apparently initiative means doing something your boss doesn't understand and can't control and therefore doesn't want to do.
  
• 10:19:39: I wasn't clear. Initiative means your boss doesn't understand and doesn't want you to do it either.
  
• 10:59:35: @wiggitywack @mammalpants Speaking of, what happened to @ginnyskal doing karaoke?
  
• 12:28:06: @mammalpants I think we're getting the point. I look forward to what programs you think we should cut in order to balance the budget. #NC=CA
  
• 12:41:15: @mammalpants My wife is a teacher. I know all about it. My problem is with the economy still tanking, a tax increase won't help long term.
  
• 12:55:34: @instanttaylor @mammalpants I got taxed for reading this. We could start an amazon.com business to offset...oh, wait... #BevPerdueTaxHike
  
• 16:40:03: "Mmmmm....This is a tasty quiche lorraine." #1stdraftmovielines
  
• 16:47:44: "See, Luke, there was all this baby momma drama with me and the dark side and yadda yadda yadda..." #1stdraftmovielines
  
• 17:52:00: @darthvader Dude, what's with all the baby momma drama?
  
• 20:03:35: I'm really sick of Dan Marino telling me to lose weight. (via @lruettimann). //and Mike Golic. And the chick in those commercials is skanky
  

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From Twitter 07-08-2009

• 09:54:46: @triangledotcom I don't think the confederate flag issue is a debate. It's about ignorance and the racism it symbolizes. Let's ask blacks.
  
• 14:05:14: @mollybuckley When is your next Runner's World profile...or porn video, Mrs. Palin?
  
• 14:08:09: @yowhatsthehaps Video of you dancing like the banana? In a banana costume doing the dance? With a baseball bat?
  
• 23:26:49: @wailinglist thanks for being up this late I think. mugs are regular price when adding to the cart
  
• 23:41:00: @wailinglist Thanks for the update. I'll have some Dalwhinnie in your honor.
  

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From Twitter 07-07-2009

• 07:44:30: My neighborhood is exciting. The listserv is discussing backyard lizards.
  
• 09:31:09: RT @DurhamNews: Flasher Alert. Two residents say man on Woodlake/Woodcroft trails exposed himself to women runners. Call 911. #wasntme #fb
  
• 09:37:48: @MyNC Sorry, but you couldn't pay me to sing that stupid song and make a phallic gesture on TV. Well, it'd have to be more than $1 and shirt
  
• 09:42:59: @lnihlen Despite that all being a mile from my house, no. Unless my running shorts fell off and I didn't know about it.
  
• 10:49:37: @RaleighWood I have to say I'm not that surprised. Didn't every male when they saw The Blue Lagoon?
  
• 13:35:05: @jessiefulks Come on good CoC parishioner! Souls don't go to heaven until Judgment Day.
  
• 15:13:29: @lruettimann What about if it was platinum? Or made with gold and platinum records? Or had those on the casket?
  

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From Twitter 07-06-2009

• 14:23:28: I don't know if there are many, if any, more chilling moments in music than the climax of Good Morning, Captain by Slint. #musicmonday
  
• 20:25:04: @abbyladybug And I will go doot doot...doot.....doot
  

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From Twitter 07-05-2009

• 08:51:04: Dear women tennis players. The men don't exhale orgasmicly when playing at the highest levels. Why do you have to? You don't. --my ears #fb
  
• 12:10:22: Why do these tennis guys get white shirts that aren't see through when they are dripping with sweat? They're hard to find for me. #fb
  
• 15:12:54: The Jim Nantz smirk while interviewing Tiger Woods is FRIGHTENING. Yikes.
  

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From Twitter 07-04-2009

• 11:06:17: Has Palin been to Argentina lately?
  
• 15:09:22: Another dead celebrity. @BreakingNews and wkrn in Nashville reporting Steve McNair, NFL QB, dead in murder-suicide. #fb
  
• 16:29:01: via @darrenrovell1, someone in the complex where McNair was shot at @anytakers.
  

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From Twitter 07-03-2009

• 08:13:19: Karaoke contest winner, advance to regional finals. Huzzah. (Don't tell anyone there were only 2 contestants in my category.) #fb
  

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From Twitter 07-02-2009

• 07:01:07: Jeff Goldblum really is dead. He confirmed it himself. http://is.gd/1lppb
  
• 11:53:50: I don't know how this is possible, but I suck at pinball on the iPhone. It's not even real pinball and I suck.
  
• 18:04:41: @LaughItUp I live in Durham and I've seen Tremors and Dune. This isn't funny. #wormapocalypse
  

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From Twitter 07-01-2009

• 11:30:34: Dear developers and coders. Please compile and run (unit test?) your code before you check it in to see if it works. Unlike my boss. kthxbye
  
• 11:43:29: If I give you a snippet of code in a bug report, spelling out the bug I've reported, where to fix it, don't reply, "when does it happen?"
  
• 13:02:23: What's the walgreen's company hotline? Because we don't have enough drugstores in the area. I want one on my street corner. CVS, too. #fb
  
• 15:18:04: @cherrybombnyc http://bit.ly/6eWtG
  
• 19:43:21: You may not know that I wrote a (lame) twitter web app competing with loudtwitter. loudtwitter is now dead apparently. uh-oh...
  
• 21:51:35: Shiny silver high heels and tights do not make you attractive. Wait...um...no, definitely not.
  
• 23:18:40: @joeyzxc twittinesis.com
  
• 23:19:39: @Aquamindy if I'm going silver, I'm getting the American apparel silver lame clothes too.
  

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From Twitter 06-30-2009

• 06:49:37: RT @rainnwilson Holly Hunter and bear scat! RT @Carliz914 Spread the Word! Cleveland news at its finest: http://bit.ly/2YuYz #fb
  
• 08:16:08: If drama follows you everywhere, the problem isn't everywhere or the world. The problem is you.
  
• 12:26:17: @BeerConnoisseur The link to the Founding Subscribers (www.beerconnoisseur.com/partners) on your website isn't working
  
• 13:04:19: Cleaning lady story of a house she cleans, can only wash bathroom floors in vinegar, said, "I smell like a vinegar douche afterwards." Nice.
  
• 13:15:20: @lruettimann They make a convertible , although I'm not sure what the point is.
  

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